IF DONALD TRUMP MOVED NEXT DOOR TO ME
Hi again, from the shores of the Salish Sea. As my beloved cousin Olya can attest, my mind sometimes travels to interesting places. Out here in the American Pacific Northwest stbka (soon to be known as) Cascadia, our elected officials are also our neighbors.
If Donald Trump was my neighbor, here are three things I would not do, based on what I have observed of him.
Donald needs to be noticed. One way to do that is to borrow something important from a neighbor. And then not return it when agreed. So even though he has one for every day of the year, he would still want me to loan him my power mower. I would not do that. The machine is not top of the lawn but it sails under its own steam, which makes it ideal for the hilly terrain on which we live in South Seattle. Donald knows this. Once he has my machine, he has me.
Unless I have two of them. I am, in fact, saving up for another one. And I have a plan. I am also recording the sounds of this one, just in case he bribes me with something I cannot resist and gets me to loan it to him that way. Once the lasagna’s all gone, I can make it sound like I bought another mower, this one a muscle job, and with the volume of those audios turned up, I can make it SOUND like I’m fighting The Lawn That Ate Seattle and I have to keep mowing it or it will eventually take over the planet.
Donald is insecure around people he doesn’t know. So I would be invited to one of his backyard barbecues, out on this lawn as big as Luxembourg. I would not accept. My mother raised me to be more than an extra in a megalomaniac’s motion picture. These events are also never lightly attended, thanks to Flowers By Guido de Nostra, whose family you do not really want to get to know.
That lawn may be huge but it’s got a big wall around it and its guards are paid to kill. My Uncle Seamus de Fernandez, the Irish bullfighter, said that Trump’s barbecues are gladiatorial blood sports with ultimate spectator participation. The “bulls” are one another and a bounty per head, killed, maimed for life or scared insane. Uncle Seamus, who changed his name and has since become famous for feats less esoteric, did admit that the food afterward was to die for. But he does not recommend the Spring salami.
If Donald Trump moved in next door to me, I would not tell anyone ~ not even God or my cousin Olya. I would invent a cover story to explain anything untoward, which would have to be very that word given the relative isolation of this evergreen urban oasis. It would need to be a story authentic enough to explain helicopter landings and an increase in limousine traffic. Not a problem.
I am blessed with neighbors who still believe in Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy and Leprechauns.
I would just tell them this was the set of an Albanian-Macedonian-Australian television series about Donald Trump being produced for Euro TV. My neighbors are artistic in their own right and appreciate good product values in other media. They would enjoy keeping a low profile about this. It would be a secret kept by 700,000 people. And I would be doing my patriotic duty by protecting the privacy of America’s chief executive and his entourage.
Okay, that’s it for this week. Take care and thanks for the ear, gang. Rusty
HALLOWEEN GAINING POPULARITY IN UKRAINE & EASTERN EUROPE
According to my observations Halloween in recent years has become more popular in this part of the world. I guess kids and teenagers as well as young adults like the idea of spicing their lives with another celebration that involves magic in a way.
Of course marketers are extremely fond of this idea as well for all sorts of promotions. While still most of us wouldn’t be able to answer what date exactly Halloween should be celebrated or the origin of it except it came to us from America, surely mostly everyone enjoys the pumpkins invasion. (smiling)
In any event, pumpkins are good from both aesthetic and nutrition points of view. So with remnants of curved pumpkin easy to make a pumpkin soup. For entertainment there is funny article What Each Myers Briggs Type Does On Halloween I wasn’t surprised to read about my type, ENTP, “Was too busy saving the world all month to get a costume in time.” What does your type do on Halloween?
That’s it for this week, Mishka. Be good and stay safe, my cousin. Olya
Olya Bereza, who was born in the Soviet Union, now lives in Ukraine and is fluent in English, Russian and Ukrainian. She is a degreed psychologist with a background in international marketing and personnel management. For comments on this please go here.
FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION
OUR SCIENCE SECTION, ABRIDGED
How cool, no pun intended. Google’s New Office Will Be Heated And Cooled By The Ground Underneath
I happen to agree. One megalomaniacal moron will not bring thousand of years of this down. Bill Nye Thinks Science Will Survive the Trump Administration
Let’s hope this isn’t something else in disguise. Scientists Spot First Alien Space Rock In Our Solar System
From Our Friends At Earth/Sky News
Astronomers confirm Earth has an asteroid buddy: It’s the best and most stable example to date of a near-Earth companion, or quasi-satellite.
From Our Friends At the NASA Earth Observatory
Mine, Seattle, is among the top five. Here Are The Cities Standing Up For Women’s Health
Congratulations and way to go, you guys! Here Are The 2017 Macarthur ‘Genius’ Grant Winners
Today we tend to think of education as if its only purpose was to make us more inventive and resourceful. Sometimes it even seems that those who are less educated are more honest and straightforward. Even though our society doesn’t emphasize it, the most crucial use of knowledge and education is to understand the importance of more wholesome action and disciplining the mind—essentially the development of a good heart
I imagine this parade’s going to be a long one for awhile. Director James Toback Accused Of Sexual Abuse By 38 Women See also HARVEY WEINSTEIN, ET AL on our News Roundup Page
Nice going, Commander In Chief. “It Made Me Cry’: Trump’s Condolence Call Gone Wrong
With all due respect, this has to be one of the dumbest laws of the new century. Honolulu’s ‘Distracted Walking’ Law Takes Effect, Targeting Phone Users
Of course he does. US Interior Secretary Denies Involvement With $300 Million Contract
We have GOT to stop doing this to ourselves. The Hidden Tragedy of the Opioid Crisis
THE GREEN BEAT
HOME, FAMILY & LIFESTYLE
BEST OF THE NET
NEXTDOOR is a dynamic non-profit community networking association helping neighborhoods across America become friendlier and better organized. They offer membership profiles, free classifieds and local social networks, all at no charge. For more information, contact them at https://nextdoor.com
Thought of the Day: For true inspiration delivered to your email every week, contact Amy at SpringggRain@aol.com It will be the nicest thing you’ll do for yourself today.
ALL CREATURES, GREAT AND SMALL
I’ll bet Edgar Allan Poe knew this. How To Tell A Raven From A Crow
Depending on the beast or the person, I could see how this could be a mixed blessing. Dogs And People Have More In Common Than You Might Think
YOU GUYS THINK WE MAKE THIS STUFF UP
ABOUT US: The Northstar Journal reaches strong, compassionate and proactively compassionate readers in 22 countries who are making our world a better place. We are proud to serve them as a resource in that regard. If you would like to become one of them and subscribe for whatever you can afford, please go here. If you would like to sponsor an edition or contribute in some other way, please contact me, Rusty Miller, at email@example.com Thank you. RM/OB