MILE HIGH ICE CREAM CONES AND OTHER EXTRAVAGANT EXAGGERATIONS

THE NORTHSTAR JOURNAL

decus, integritas, probitas

Winner of Two Hersh Best Read On The Net Awards

Now reaching informed readers in America, Canada, Ireland, England, Scotland, France, Germany, Norway, Sweden, Russia & Australia

Volume 5, No. 20

Sunday, May 20, 2012

Seattle,Washington

Merritt Scott Miller, Editor

Dennis William Steussy, Associate Editor

Hi again from the shores of the Salish Sea.  Merriam-Webster defines hyperbole (hi-PER-bow-lee) as an extravagant exaggeration.  It uses as examples one I’ve never heard before and one that is as rusty as an abandoned crosscut saw; “mile high ice cream cone,” and “enough food to feed an army.”

Hyperbole has been around for a long time.  Without going into academic citation (and boring you and I both in that process), and without making a career out of it or using like eight million words to delineate it, Shakespeare used hyperbole.  So did Mark Twain and Bret Harte.  Most standup comics use it.  Monty Python and the folks at Saturday Night Live were masters at it.

I have noticed, however, that on the Net and in chatrooms, it doesn’t always work because apparently what is one person’s hyperbole is another person’s reality.  I think that’s because there are more people of different demographics in an online chatroom than there would be in an offline venue.

If I tell an audience around here, for instance, that sometimes I feel like there really are 25,000 Canadians living and working around here…24,999 Canada geese and me, they laugh because it’s been raining hard on their roof too.  In an online chatroom the other day, someone accused me of being mathematically challenged or assumed I was too medicated to keyboard accurately.

If I use the word “monsoon” to describe a rain storm here or say the wind was blowing so hard, the clothes on the line outside were drying sideways, people in the whole Northwest and Canada laugh because they know the exaggeration isn’t so far from the reality.  Sometimes in Internet chatrooms, people tell me they had no idea the weather around Seattle was that extreme.  It is precisely for such misinterpretations that I get frowns from local and state tourism and convention bureaus. 

I have, therefore, decided to devote more to the study of this particular literary device and to perhaps, in the future, be more circumspect in its employ.  If, however, I decide that what is really necessary are more people who can laugh at themselves and the world along with us, all bets regarding the restrained use of this literary device are off.

Thank you.  And yes, I feel better for having shared that.  Have a good week and stuff.

IN OTHER NEWS

The ethnic character of Americais changing.  According to the Census Bureau, Caucasian births are no longer the majority.  For more on this one, go here.

More people than ever before are generating their own power.  Oregon Public Broadcasting’s Ecotrope reports.

Great Britain’s prime minister announced that free parenting classes will be available in Middlesbrough, Camden in north London and High Peak, Derbyshire.  Mr. Cameron said, however, that they could be be extended throughout England and Wales if successful.  For more details on this and other measures Number 10 Downing Street is advocating to help families in the UK, please go here.

OH CANADA

On the first anniversary of the Slave Lake Fire, many are asking, “Could it happen again, somewhere else?”  “Yes,” says the Ottawa Citizen, “and it will.”

In honour of the re-launch of PawNation.com, HuffPost Canada Living is holding a contest to discover Canada’s best pet — and they want you to take part.

We firmly believe in “appetite tourism”.  Here are Canada’s 5 Best Gourmet Burgers.

GOOD EXAMPLES

We congratulate Toronto on becoming the 18th most influential city in the world.

The skipper of the Sea Shepherd faces extradition to Costa Rica on charges his vessel attempted to sink a local shark fin fishing boat in 2002.  Paul Watson was arrested earlier this month in Germany, where he is currently in custody.  He has two members of the European Parliament interceding on his behalf.  For details, please go here.

Is this street too fat for me?  Check out one city’s project to make its neighborhoods more “walk friendly,” one street at a time.

SCIENCE, TECHNOLOGY, NATURE & EXPLORATION

American astronauts are still going into space.  NASA is just not taking them there.

We should all live so long.  86-million-year-old bacteria have been found in the Pacific Ocean still consuming oxygen.

Remember that Bruce Willis movie about the oil field roughnecks who went into space to destroy this Texas-sized asteroid headed for earth?  NASA recently reported that it has THUS FAR identified 4,700 big rocks out there that could pose some threat.  It is the “thus far” part of this which particularly tweaks me out.

HEALTH AND LIFESTYLE

How many of you think that an overweight, middle-aged male person should take up jogging?  Everyone who answered yes should probably read this article entitled Why Mid-Life Health Kicks Can Wreck Men’s Bodies

Halitosis, we have been told, was cause for war in certain ancient societies.  It was considered the subtlest and most offensive of diplomatic insults.  To avoid causing conflict among your family and friends, check out 10 Ways to Get Rid of Stinky Breath.

If financial worries are stressing you out, you might want to check and see which of these 17 things you probably don’t need that you’re spending money on.

RESOURCE LINKS:
Center For Disease Control Disease FAQs Index
Tips and Tools For Staying Young
Weight Watchers:  Calculate Your Body Mass Index
 

ON THE CANCER FRONT

Cancer among the middle-aged in Britain has dropped by 40 percent.  To learn why, please go here.

RESOURCES AND RELATED LINKS:
Cancer:  What You Need to Know
American Cancer Society
Canadian Cancer Society
 

NORTHSTAR FORUM

Robotic manufacturing could have as dramatic an impact on employment as the assembly line did when it made its debut.  Is this necessarily such a good thing?  How dependent do we really want to become on automation this complete?  The Canadian Press discusses.

FROM YOU GUYS

I made the mistake the other day of mentioning to some of you that I’m saving up for a Nissan Leaf and 2,500 miles of extension cord.  I’m not an auto expert so while I appreciate being asked what car I think is the best, I defer to Grist magazine and this article entitled, appropriately enough, Which Car Should My Family Buy?

BEST NET VIDEOS THIS WEEK

Check out the largest zoom-able photograph and video of our planet ever taken.

‘Turkana Boy,’ Richard Leakey Meet In National Geographic’s ‘Bones Of Turkana’

TAKE A BREAK ON NORTHSTAR

Animal Tracks is msnbc.com’s Critter Stuff.  They feature stories of every facet of the creature kingdom from the domestic to the primordial.  This is a great stress buster for me and a profound pick-me-up if I’m having a “poor me” day.

Daily Crossword:  This one from Universal has two levels.  It is extremely easy to use and it has some features like music and clues that we thought were pretty cool.

Foundation For A Better Life produces 15 – 90 second inspirational videos equaling ~ if not surpassing ~ the video vignettes produced by Hallmark, Folgers Coffee and Campbell Soup.  Three I’d recommend right off the top are Concert, The Class Room and Spirit of America.

National Geographic Kids Page:  If you enjoy learning about the places, people and things which make life on this planet such a unique experience?

National Geographic Video Page is the diversion the doctor ordered If you’re looking for a video experience that will definitely take you out of wherever you are and you don’t mind your reality coming at you in relatively short bursts (about long enough to keep a fussing child occupied).

Tank Hunter – This puts you behind the controls of a tank on a vast battlefield in which everything from small tanks to big ones to invisible ones is shooting at you.  Definitely the best game play of its type I have personally encountered.

Word Games:  Merriam Webster has a totally creative menu, including a daily vocabulary quiz where you can see how you rank with people your age, younger and older.

CRITTER STUFF

Check out these new snow monkeys born at the Highland Wildlife Park in Scotland.

Have you ever wondered, considering how ubiquitous a life form there are, cities are not littered with dead pigeons

Check out one of the most ambitious “critter cam” projects to date.  This one involves mounting cameras on the dorsal fins of Great White sharks.

RELATED LINKS:
Living With Wildlife
BBC’s wildlife finder
National Geographic Daily News – Animals
 

YOU GUYS THINK I MAKE THIS STUFF UP

And there was the naked unicyclist in Texas who was charged with distracting drivers and creating a hazard.  For the video and probably more than you need to know about this, yep, go here.

Well, that’s about it for this week.  As a final word, The Northstar Journal is supported by contributions from readers like yourselves so if you enjoyed what you read here and would like to toss a dollar or two in the pot, as it were, please go here.

Take care, stay well and God Bless.

Merritt Scott (Rusty) Miller

Writer/Editor For Hire

Wrath of the Testament, an exciting seagoing saga of war and rebellion, is now available for $3.99 at amazon.com.

About minstrel312

MERRITT SCOTT MILLER Bio Wrath of the Testament Author and Northstar Journal editor Merritt Scott (Rusty) Miller is a former newspaper reporter who has published extensively in the Pacific Northwest and several times nationally. A U.S. Navy veteran of the Vietnam War, he began his career in the alternative media of the mid-Seventies. His own Sacramento-based monthly ~ Rapline ~ drew praise from Sacramento BEE metro columnist Herb Michelson in a column published that that newspaper; and from Berkeley Film Quarterly editor and author of the bestsellers Ecotopia and Ecotopia Emerging, Ernest Callenbach. A Northern California native with roots in British Columbia, Mr. Miller has written for several Northwest community newspapers, United Press International, the daily Portland Oregonian and for such Seattle publications as the Post-Intelligencer, The Seattle Press and the University Herald. As an investigative reporter for the McMinnville, Oregon News-Register ~ and in conjunction with CBS News in New York, Washington, DC and Flagstaff, Arizona ~ Mr. Miller localized a story of alleged Contra gun-running by an international air freight company headquartered in that Willamette Valley community. During the 1987 Angel Complex Fire in southern Oregon, Mr. Miller worked as the lead dispatcher for the U.S. Forest Service and covered the disaster for National Public Radio and as a special writer for the Portland, Oregonian. His 1988 series on child abuse for a rural weekly earned him praise from the Oregon Newspaper Publishers Association. In his career as a journalist, Mr. Miller has interviewed a Nobel peace laureate; an internationally renowned abstract artist; a popular folksinger and various Pacific Northwest elected officials, include a state treasurer and governor. An accomplished travel book writer, Mr. Miller has penned demographic and feature copy for the “Best Choices” series on Eastern Washington, British Columbia, Virginia, South Carolina and Atlanta. As either a contract or staff publicist, he has served a host of clients including the Olympia Music Festival, Umpqua Valley Community Hospital, the City of Canyonville, the Tiller Ranger District, The English School, the Yamhill County Board of Commissioners, Yamhill County Assessor Kim Worrell and Workers of Oregon Development. His freelance publications include: United Press International, the Seattle Post-Intelligencer, the Portland Oregonian, Forest World, American Trucking, Trucks, Oregon Adventures, Oregon Education, Old Oregon, The Entertainer, the Seattle Press, the San Juan Island Sounder, Northwest Passage, Northwest Connection, Seattle Source, Seattle Forum, the University of Colorado’s Writers Forum, Clouds, The long Beach Literary Journal and the Pacific Media Group. He has worked since the age of 13 and has been a hop harvester, professional musician, civil servant, forester, convenience market clerk, lumber mill worker, temporary word processor, technical writer and editor. He has also led a social services research and development team and has six years of radio and telephone communications experience. His interests include astronomy, aviation, camping, Canada, communications, conversation, cooking, dancing, economic development, education, environmentalism, exploration, film/DVDs, fine dining, government, green technology, health. History, human rights, International community, Internet media, law, literature, marine engineering & design, medicine, music, nature, networking, outdoors, pets, photography, romance, science, sexuality, technology, travel, water, wildlife His honors and awards include: Letter of Appreciation - Amnesty International; US Senator Patti Murray Letter of Appreciation for The Northstar Journal Blog; Editors Choice, International Library of Poetry; Congressman Edward Murray Letter of Appreciation; Congressman Frank Chopp Letter of Appreciation; Hersch Best Read on the Net Award for The Northstar Journal; President Bill Clinton Letter of Appreciation; Workers Of Oregon Development Certificate of Appreciation; City of Canyonville Police Department Certificate of Appreciation; City of Canyonville Mayor’s Office Certificate of Appreciation; California Supreme Court Justice Rose Bird Letter of Appreciation; Northwest Magazine Editorial Board Letter of Appreciation for Rain; Editorial Award, Society of Professional Journalists; Sacramento Bee Metro Column; Honor Roll: California State University Long Beach; Deans List: Long Beach City; Mr. Miller currently resides in Seattle, Washington, where he continues to edit and publish The Northstar Journal. He is working on two novels concurrently and a sequel to Wrath of the Testament.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s